“All I need is a little love now and then, but some chocolate will do for now.”
- Lucy Van Pelt -
Fritter, fry or boil, you may,
There’s nothing like a potato today.
Cheapest veggie you can buy,
Purchase big bags without a sigh!
With inflation and soaring tax,
Meat prices reaching their max.
Potatoes peeled washed and dried,
Fry them deep in porky hide.
Or bake it well, make a potato pie,
And take it down with bread of rye.
When short of time, rush hour it is,
Mash and mix with creamy cheese.
Summer, winter and monsoon too,
A potato can be found all year through.
Potatoes today, potatoes tomorrow,
Best thing to eat to purge your sorrow.
Hear me out, for I speak well,
All hail potatoes, they shall always sell!
Now you jumpstart another day
Soaked in chilly beans or syrup
who knows what will come your way
the chilly bean or the syrup!
If every time I shed a tear
A white pearl were to form
Then would you also cry my dear
To see if a white pearl would form
And rich we’d get from pearls galore
That from crying we would form
Little joys of kisses sought
and love’s labour lost
what is this life if not
this sweet molten frost!
I tried a new fruit this weekend, since I’m always on the lookout for fruits that aren’t a huge pain in my ass to prepare*. As I sprint out the door at 9.15 to reach work by 9.30, I need something efficient and easy – an orange just won’t cut it.
This fruit I tried hails from the Himalayan region of Tibet, apparently (although that part of Tibet is dry, cold at night and has basically all the ingredients you don’t want when growing fruit – but hey, I believe anything the nice Health Food Store Crazy Gawar Hippy tells me).
Behold the Tibetan Goji-berry!
Ok, now I just Wiki-pedia’d that to give you all a nice little link and got something about a Wolfberry…what the hell is going on here? Time to get Google involved.
I just uncovered a scandal in the fruit patch! Turns out those Wolfberry guys are selling their product as Goji berries – and Wikipedia is endorsing this! These poor Tibetan monks spend days blessing the little berries, rumored to make people happy for days (natural Viagra anyone?), and those Wolfberry growers just swarm into the US markets, labeling everything they can get their grubby little hands on as Goji berries.
I am shocked and appalled** but mostly disappointed.
Wasn’t that the worst when your parents said that to you? “I’m not mad, just disappointed”.
“Sooo…am I allowed to continue smoking pot and drinking your rye on our garage roof, or not?”
Where was I? Oh yes, Goji Berry “Scandal of the Century”. That’s it I’m starting a not-for-profit group benefiting the Rights of the Goji-Berry. That’s right, this is a war on Berry-imitation and I won’t stop until all perpetrators are dealt with accordingly, by being forced to eat Wolfberries by the handful. Anti-oxidant? I think not! How do like those Berries?
And to think, this was going to be a post about the nutritional benefits of a fruit. I’ve found my meaning in life.
*If it involves a knife – it’s too much work.
** mainly because I have nothing better to do with my time than look into a scandal involving mostly unheard of berries and some greedy fruit dudes.
