The Embrace

Another day, another week, another month is here. Bob Dylan is still crooning somewhere. He is telling me that I believe in you. I have now gone back to the old days of thinking about people who are not really there. Sometimes I feel so disenchanted with life, what is the meaning of all this? I live, and then I die, and everything in between, does it really matter. So much pain, so much suffering, so much sadness, reaching out for a truth that must not exist. Everything is reeking of rot, it seems sometimes like everything is dead and we are only believing it all to be real. I close my eyes and rise above my little space, above, and suddenly I can see the land getting farther away from me, my little space getting enmeshed with more and more of sameness. There is no novelty left in anything, nothing seems to be fresh- we are all the same, mirror reflections of each other, only believing to be different. And yet knowing we aren’t. After all this I allow myself to be carried away by everything that is putrid and decaying. Why can I not spread more love? More laughter? More happiness? I too have become a cog in the wheel churning out more and more nonsense feeling satisfied with the selfishness of the self, of all that I think is mine. But nothing here is really mine. I own nothing, I only have something for rent, for sometime and one day everything is washed away back to shores from where they come. I feel torn apart, torn apart from the two visions I see ahead of me, the one that I see all around, of money of the riches that even I aspire to achieve someday maybe, and then there is the one that sacrifices all that for something much greater, more divine. I don’t believe in God, I don’t know if there is God. if it matters or not whether i do or not, but what about the now, the now that is screaming out for help, that is standing ahead of me with its arms outstretched begging for help, I want to reach out, spread some love, some happiness. All changes begin from the self I think, maybe if I change myself bit by bit, the world around me will also begin to change, and I shall see it again in all its beauty and splendor. Embrace life, embrace love.